Everyone hates a whiner, right?

First of all, thanks to the people who are rooting for me. God love ya! AND ... drum roll ... I heard through the grapevine that someone read this blog and donated food to their local food bank. WELL DONE, YOU!!!! That makes it all worth it for me.

Today is a tough one: maybe it's the nicotine withdrawals and/or the prednisone, but my emotions are all in a twist. I had to go back to my doctor's office yesterday and ask her to to fill out the forms again that she already filled out on December 30th, as they have gone AWOL in the mail. The forms qualify me for a provincial employment search assistance program for people with disabilities. Yes, there's the horrible "D" word. I shudder every time I hear it. But, even though my doctor speaks a harsh truth, I like her. She's honest and straightforward. As she filled out the forms, she muttered the words aloud that she was writing: "Prognosis poor ... will continue to deteriorate ... " Yeesh. So this morning, I have to go hand-deliver the forms to the D-place. I feel like a kid whistling in the dark. Tra-la-la .....

One friend told me I paint a bleak picture, but three others say I have a great attitude. Well, which is it? Funny how people see things differently. I think the picture IS bleak, it doesn't require a coat of gloomy paint from me. Personally, I think it's amazing that I haven't chucked myself off a bridge yet. At least I'm trying to find the humour in it. Here's one: most mornings, my cat licks my closed eyelids to wake me up when she wants food. How cute is THAT?? Maybe I should figure out whose eyelids I need to lick.

But back to reality, everyone hates a whiner. Even me. And apparently, even my own brother. A few people have asked me where my family is in all this: Both my parents are deceased; my mum died of breast cancer in 2001 and my dad passed away just last year, making me a 40-something-year-old orphan. My one, extraordinarily successful sibling lives on another continent and clearly doesn't give a crap. I sent him a link to my blog last week so he could track my progress. He immediately assumed I was asking him for money and I haven't heard from him since. I'm sure he finds this blog quite distasteful.

Hey bro, if you read this: I never asked you for a cent and don't send me money if you don't want to! I don't care about that. But c'mon, at least have a heart.